I always was and still am a generally happy-go-lucky person. When I entered counseling I finally recognized that I had an angry side too.
I can’t remember the exact moment that I made the realization that I was projecting anger (from the loss/pain) onto my poor mother 😕. Unfortunately the anger went far beyond the typical rebellious stage of my teenage years. I also projected it onto my ex-boyfriends and ex-husband 😞. Instead of allowing myself to feel and acknowledge the pain, I misdirected it onto the people that I cared/loved a lot. It also was fear (again) of letting people get too close to me for fear of them leaving. All of this plagued my subconscious until years later. Processing these feelings has helped put in perspective who and what I really was angry at and why. By identifying these, I’ve been able to remove its power over me and to not be identified by the anger anymore. Even sharing my story publicly has helped me channel that remaining anger(pain/fear) into something more productive and positive. I’m also in the process of creating a blog because I don’t want to bombard Facebook and Instagram daily. 😉♥️😊🙌🏽
“Very truly I tell you, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy.”
John 16:20 NIV
